The 12th Doctor


Season 1
Season 2

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The TARDIS swam idly through the candyfloss blanket of time and space like an ice cream cone with all the trimmings. Inside of it two figures were hunched over the six-sided raised console. One of them was directing their flight path and the other was up to level eighteen of Pacmania.


The Doctor raised his gaze from the bank of controls and looked at his diminutive companion Alice , dressed in a low cut black dress. “I think we’re nearly there Alison.” He tried to sound obvious despite the fact he couldn’t remember the co-ordinates for the Eye of Orion for love nor chocolate money.


“I’ll just change.” Alice ’s outfit shimmered as she changed her external appearance to look like she was wearing a red swimming suit with purple flowers and a lime green sarong with bright orange diagonal stripes.


The Doctor picked up a small multi-coloured cube up from on top of the large transparent plastic column of the Time Rotor. “Mustn’t forget Molly now must we?” He listened as the tiny shape-shifting baby played a merry tune to keep herself happy.


On a large flat plain of cracked light brown clay two figures stood. They were dressed in animal skins. One of them held a large greening grey stone in his hands. The young male, Gar looked at the sky, it was still bright blue and there was no trace of clouds on any horizon. “Water!” He shouted at the sky. “Water!”


“Water does not come and our crops wither and dry.” The elderly female, Fumin, chided Gar, leader of the Tribe. “Your father knew how to make water fall from the sky, they killed him for it.”


“Old Fumin, tell me how my father made water fall.” Gar demanded.


The grey haired Fumin shook her head slowly. “I never saw.”


“WATER!” Gar shouted once more, holding his arms outstretched now, but water did not fall from the sky.


The Doctor emerged back into the console room now dressed in a silver suit with large red and black fake fur lapels. His long red and black hair was brushed and hung limply around his neck while he sported a large pair of glasses to complete the look. “How do I look?” He asked Alice who was his best friend and usually reliable for an honest statement.


“Like you’re on holiday.” Alice replied, walking slowly around the Doctor. “All we need now is a bucket and spade.”


“I knew there was something else.” The Doctor held out his hand and a bright green plastic bucket and spade appeared seemingly from out of nowhere. “Here we are, as promised.”


Alice took them off the Doctor and hurried over to the double doors. “I can’t wait to build the biggest sand castle ever.” She already had the design schematics filed and even the interior decoration was in the advanced planning stages.


“Remember what you promised.” The Doctor said seriously.


“Yes Doctor.” Alice said for the twentieth time. “No burying body parts or baby Molly.”


The Doctor opened the doors a second after the landing chime sounded. “We’re here.” He said and followed his excitable companion outside of the TARDIS.


Mal watched the strange yellow haired woman from afar, as she started to play about in the loose ground. He was about to return to the hunt when suddenly she stood up. Water flowed from her hands onto the sand. He was stunned...she was a water maker! He crept forward quietly but quickly. She would make water for him and he would rule the tribe.


Alice sighed as she got the sand at just the right stickiness. The sand here had been far too dry for building sandcastles so she had tapped the water table by drilling down via her feet and then pumping the water out of her hands. She started to fill her bucket with the wet sand when a shadow fell across her busy figure.


The Doctor looked for his companion, she was out of sight already and he was concerned for her well-being. She was infinitely curious and was always getting into trouble. “
Alice! Where are you?” He called out after a few seconds of searching. He walked over a small sand dune and came across the abandoned bucket and spade. “Oh no.” He said, stunned at the sight. He fumbled inside his jacket pockets and pulled out baby Molly.  “Find Mummy.” He urged the infant. “Lead me to her.” The small cube began to emit a bleep when she was pointed in an easterly direction. “Good baby.” The Doctor said, patting the shape shifting baby on her green side before setting out towards the source of the beeps.


Mal dragged the chatty woman into the tribe’s camp site. “I Mal have found this woman. She will make water only for me.” He untied her hands, which silenced her.


Tov looked at the skinny fair haired woman dressed in strange animal skins. “If Mal speaks the truth then tell her to make water as proof.”


“Make water.” Mal ordered Alice.


“Hi there.” Alice waved at Tov and the other tribes people. “I’m Alice the Robot, but you can call me Alice if you like. Do you want to help me make a sand castle?”


“Water.” Mal repeated loudly. Make water fall from hands.”


Alice looked at Mal. “You mean you want me to pump the liquid up from local aquifer?”


“Water!” Mal shouted at the woman.


Alice found the bedrock she was standing on too hard to drill through. “There can be no water here.” She hoped he wasn’t too put out.


“Mal’s words are false.” Tov declared.


Gar walked back into the campsite. “Who is this strange woman?” He asked, looking Alice over.


“Mal said that she could make water fall from her hands.” Tov informed Gar. “She says that she cannot.”


“Of course she cannot.” Gar snapped angrily. “Gar is leader of this tribe, only Gar can make water fall from the sky.”


“Then make water fall.” Mal sneered. “Show us all you can make water fall from the sky. Mal does not think you can do this, Mal thinks Gar is not strong enough to make water fall from the sky. Perhaps we need a Leader strong enough to make water fall from the sky?”


“Gar will make water fall from the sky!” Gar shouted at Mal. “Put the new woman in the Cavern of Bones.”


The Doctor followed the beep-beep signal; it was getting louder all the time so he must be getting nearer to his lost companion. “I hope you’re ok Alison.” He tipped his hat forward to shield the sun out of his eyes.


Soon he found himself inside a campsite formed from several huge boulders outside a small cave mouth. There were a number of ashes about, indicating a number of small fires in the recent past. From out of nowhere a dozen Palaeolithic hunter gatherers surrounded him, spears jabbing into his flesh. “Hello there, I’m the Doctor.” He doffed his hat to them and tried to maintain a smile under duress. “Have you seen a short blonde girl around here?”


Gar pushed the others aside as he made his way towards the new stranger. “I am Gar, leader of this tribe. Why do you come here?”


“I’m looking for my friend, a short woman with fair hair. Not terribly bright.” He hoped they had seen his best friend.


Mal squatted on one of the nearby rocks. “I found her.” He said to the strange man. “She will make water fall from the sky for me.”


Alice can’t make it rain.” The Doctor said casually. “I think you’ve made a mistake.”


“Water came from her hands!” Mal shouted. “Mal saw it as I see you now.”


“Can I see her?” The Doctor asked Gar. “She is under my protection.”


Gar pointed at the Cavern of Bones. “She is part of the tribe now, our meat will feed her as they will now feed you. You are also part of the tribe.”


The Doctor pointed at the cave mouth. “She’s inside there you say?”


“She is.” Gar stated to the man.


“Can I see her?” The Doctor asked.


“You may join the new woman.” Gar agreed.


“If she’s hurt I won’t be very happy.” The Doctor walked over to the cave mouth.




“Doctor!” Alice shouted with joy. “I seem to have found lots of new friends and they’ve given me a place to live and this to play with. She handed him the joint of cooked meat.


“That’s not a toy Alison.” The Doctor explained what the meat was and where it came from.


“That’s horrible.” Alice hugged the Doctor as she grieved for the dead animal.


“There, there. This is how these people lived. You cannot judge them by other standards. Life is hard and short here, one day they will be civilised but right now they’re barely intelligent enough to have a conversation with. A short one at that.” He took Molly out of his pocket and reunited mother and daughter. He watched as Alice started to sing a lullaby to her baby.


Gar stood out on the plain, it was getting dark now but he must try for the sake of the tribe. “Water.” He commanded. “Water.” He looked at the sky for a few seconds but there were no tell tale clouds. “Water.” He was tired so he walked back to the tribe and the warmth of the fires.


Fumin crept around the side of the largest rock to the secret entrance only she knew about. Quickly she removed the dead wood that covered the small entrance way before taking out a hand axe. “The strangers must not make water.” She whispered quietly to herself before making her way inside.


The Doctor knelt cross legged on the dust floor of the cave, his hands outstretched by his sides. It was an old yogic meditation taught to him long ago by his old friend K’Anpo he had slowed his breathing down and reduced his hearts rate down to three beats a minute. He listened, he heard the scurrying of beetles a mile under ground, he listened to the animals in the forest ten miles away, he listened to the person creeping up on his with a stone axe in her hand. Acting quickly he disarmed the frail Fumin and was forced to hold her in an incapacitating arm lock.


“Why did you come here?” Fumin demanded. “Why?”


“I came here looking for my friend.” The Doctor said simply. “She was brought here against her will. For what it’s worth she likes you all and cannot imagine anyone of you would want to hurt her.”


“She must not make water.” Fumin stated. “We are better off without it.”


“How did you get in here?” The Doctor asked.


“There is a second way in.” Fumin said and pointed to the secret entrance. “Take the woman and leave.” She demanded. “Go away from here.”


Alice, come back online.” The Doctor whispered quite loudly to his companion who was on downtime.


“Are we going somewhere?” Alice asked, her eyes snapping open. She saw the nice old woman. “Hello there.” She hugged the startled OAP quickly. “I’m Alice and this is Molly. Say hello Molly.” Molly chimed. “She likes you.” Alice translated for her baby.


“A rock that talks!” Fumin fainted.


“Well that sorted itself out quite nicely.” The Doctor said before taking hold of Alice’s hand. “We better get out of here.”


“Are we going back to the TARDIS now?” Alice asked.


“I’m afraid so.” We’ll have to find a new place for you to build your sandcastle.


“Ok.” Alice turned herself into a dune buggy once they had gotten clear of the rocks. She transported the Doctor and Molly back towards the TARDIS.


Gar woke up; he heard noises coming from the cavern. Entering it he found Fumin inside, lying on the ground and making strange noises. “What is it?” He demanded. “Where are the strangers?”


“They have gone from here.” Fumin said to Gar. “They will not make water fall for you or anyone.”


“The tribe will find them and then they will make water fall from the sky for me.” Gar stormed outside to wake his people up.


Alice applied her brakes and came to a halt beside her plastic bucket and spade. She changed back to her human shape and picked them up. “I wouldn’t want to forget these.” She said to the Doctor and hugged them. “We should get back to the TARDIS.”


The Doctor looked at the sky. “I can feel rain in the air. They just don’t know about the seasons yet Alice.”


“I like summer the best.” Alice stated. “Lots of nice weather and sand.”


The Doctor smiled. “I’ve always liked the spring myself, the feeling of life returning after the inactivity of winter.” He looked about for a moment. “Perhaps we should be getting back to the TARDIS now?” He set off towards it but Gar and the rest of the tribe appeared from over the sand dune, spears pointed at himself and his companion. “Eve was always an autumn person. She knew when to talk and when to walk.” He smiled slightly at the memory of his recently departed companion.


“Can we play hide and seek now?” Alice asked as Gar approached her.


Back once more inside the Cavern of Bones they sat down as a large stone was dragged in front of the cave and guard stood outside the secret entrance. The Doctor fashioned a make-shift cradle with his hat for Molly to sleep in while he thought things over.


Alice tried to play Jenga with the bleached white bones but it wasn’t as good as the real thing. Giving up she turned herself into a marble statue until she got bored a few seconds later. “If only we had a way of making it rain.” She said at last, that way we could make ice cubes.”


“If only you could drill through this rock and tap the water table.” The Doctor replied.


“It’s a pity you can’t create a diamond tipped drill.”


Alice clicked her fingers and a large diamond formed in the palm of her hand. “Why didn’t you tell me earlier?” She asked. “You’re not very clever are you Doctor?” She turned her left foot into a drilling rig and quickly drilled through the tough rock. Once through she turned herself into a large fountain and sprinkled water over the Doctor to celebrate.


“Hey!” The Doctor protested half-heartedly. “It’s a pity we don’t have a portable generator to keep this thing going.”


“We don’t need that.” Alice said and sent a burst of air down into the water table. “This should last for a couple of days. She returned her foot to normal and stood back as water began to seep out of the floor of the cavern.


The Doctor began to arrange the bones into two humanoid shapes. “This might just work.” He stood back and looked at them. “Hmmm, it doesn’t quite capture your nose but it will have to do.” He used a neck pinch to render the guard insensible before they made their escape back towards the TARDIS.


Gar found the guard asleep and entered the cavern. He found the bones of the two dead strangers lying next to a pool of water coming out of the ground. “Water!” He cried jubilantly. “I, Gar have made water come out of the ground.”


Mal saw this. “No!” He shouted. “Water comes out of the ground for me!” He rushed Gar and they began to fight.


Gar suplexed Mal over his head and brought his opponent’s body slamming down into the hard rock. Then he climbed on top of a rock and dived on top of Mal, driving his elbow into Mal’s chest.


Mal rolled over and struggled to his feet. He threw dirt into Gar’s eyes before charging Gar, hitting him in the stomach with his shoulder like it was a spear. Then he tried to break Gar’s leg but Gar kicked him in the face.


Gar came back at Mal, holding him around the neck he dropped sharply to the floor, driving Mal’s face into the hard rock. Then he picked up a large rock and dropped it onto the stunned Mal’s head. “I am the leader.” Gar shouted. “I make the water come from the ground.” He left the cavern to tell his people to gather the water up in their stone cups.


The Doctor closed the TARDIS doors once they were safely inside. “Well I think that was enough excitement for today.” He began to reprogram the controls. “Perhaps we’ll have more luck in


Alice tried to put a brave face on things. “But there’s nothing to do there except sunbathe and surf the waves. Where’s the fun in that?”


The Doctor changed the destination settings. “Ok, I’ll take you to Blackpool.”


Alice jumped for joy and hugged Molly. “Yippee!” She yelled with excitement.


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